Imparting Wisdom From “The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating”

I received a copy of The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating by Andy Stanley from Family Christian for purposes of evaluation. Thoughts are my own.

A few weeks before Valentine’s Day, our church’s youth pastor approached me and asked if I could speak at the Youth Ministry’s Valentine’s Day Fellowship. And because love is a topic my youth cell group members are very much interested in, I said yes without any hesitation.

I have discussed about love and dating in my weekly meet-ups with 6 young ladies at our church. Because their ages range from 15 to 19, I know that they’re all in that stage when they’re more curious about relating with guys. I know that many young people start to become more sexually curious in that age range, with many teenagers starting to discover adult websites such as TubeV link that can teach them more about sex. In fact, all but one of them are currently in a relationship. And as their cell group leader, I want to make sure I’m able to impart as much wisdom with them as I can.

I have organized several “Love Courtship & Marriage” type of seminars when I myself was part of the Youth Ministry. But since that’s already 10 years ago, I recognize that a lot of things have already changed in the way young people view dating. So I was kind of at a loss for a good outline about what to tell these young people. Good thing Family Christian gave me the opportunity to review The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating by Andy Stanley.

The New Rules for Love Sex and Dating

In The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating, Andy Stanley explores the challenges, assumptions, and land mines associated with dating in the twenty-first century. Best of all, he offers the most practical and uncensored advice you will ever hear on this topic. Not for the faint of heart, The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating challenges single Christ followers to step up and set a new standard for this generation!

One of the things I love about this book is that it highlights one nugget of wisdom that I’ve held on through the years. It’s that we need to strive to become the person the person we’re looking for is looking for. Was that confusing? LOL!

One of my mentors once told me, if you’re wishing for a king, then become a queen. Meaning, if I have such high standards for the person I want to marry someday, then I also need to make sure I live up to the same standards. We can’t all be very idealistic about our “right one” if we’re not trying to become their “right one” too.

Youth Heart 4

In this book, pastor and bestselling author Andy Stanley provides practical, biblical, uncensored advice to anyone who is dating or thinking about marriage in this day and age.

I love that the book tries to dispel some myths about love that young people may believe in. And I’m glad to have been able to share a few pieces of advice as someone who has gone through quite a few dating-related mishaps but still emerged “victorious” because I decided to trust God in this arena.

Youth Heart

If you don’t want a marriage like the majority of marriages then stop dating like the majority of daters! Andy Stanley made this emphatic call for his readers to prepare themselves for a lifelong commitment with their right person. A lot of people are so focused on meeting the right one than actually preparing for a life with that right one.

So I challenged our church’s young people to raise their standards when it comes to how they relate with people of the opposite sex. And by raising their standards, I don’t mean having a checklist of what that person should be. I hear some of them are using snapsext to explore themselves sexually if you’re interested, read about snapsext. What’s important is that they make a checklist of who they should strive to be so that they can also become the right person for their right person. There are actually a lot of good points that Andy Stanley raises in this book, but this particular one really resonated with me. ๐Ÿ™‚

I’ll recommend this to any single person out there who’s planning to someday get married and stay married. It’s also beneficial for anyone who’s married because it gives us a good perspective on relationships.


The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating is available for purchase at Family Christian stores near you or at

The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating Book Giveaway

One lucky reader will receive a copy of The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating! Giveaway is open to US residents who are at least 18 years old. Void where prohibited by law. No Purchase Necessary. Giveaway ends March 3, 2015 at 11:59pm EST.

To enter, simply comment below with a relationship advice. It can be advice for singles who are planning to get married someday, or for married people who may need some wisdom from other people’s experiences.

Additional entries: Click here and tweet this. Leave a separate comment with your tweet link for each time you tweet. You can do this everyday.

Winner will be drawn using Good luck!

I received a copy of The New Rules for Love, Sex & Dating by Andy Stanley for purposes of evaluation. Thoughts are my own. This is sponsored by Family Christian. I am not responsible for prize fulfillment.


Imparting Wisdom From “The New Rules for Love, Sex, and Dating” — 74 Comments

  1. Yes I have been through the years when my kids started dating. I read a book that said no more dating. It said teens should only date as couples so their emotions don’t let them get carried away.

  2. It is so important to make sure to pick the right person and to make sure that we walk in truth and honesty and do not compromise for anyone! There is so much bad dating going on and being pressured and going with our peer group is dangerous! I am glad that you are helping these young people! The book sounds great.

  3. I believe great communication is great in a relationship. My husband and I communicate about everything and often have conversations whether they are tougher easy.

  4. This is a book both me, and my teenage twin daughters need to read, sometimes I wonder if they hear all the things I tell them about relationships or if they think I am just a nagging mommy.

  5. When you are in a relationship with someone, remember the triangle affect. The closer you grow to your partner, on the other side of the triangle, the closer you grow to God. And the closer you grow to God the closer you will go to your partner.

  6. I think the best advise i have to give people in relationships is to ENJOY your time with one another. We all have different seasons we go through and its not always easy to want to work through issues. It is absolutely beautiful when you do. Put God be at the center of all your relationships, and they will flourish!

  7. Don’t date until you are an interesting person. Until your married be your own identity, don’t become one identity with your SO.

  8. learn to know yourself, learn to know the other person and learn to know each other together as individuals and as a whole. once you choose someone, choose to commit and keep working at being committed.

  9. I am so blessed to have an amazing husband with a servant’s heart. We have worked hard on our marriage for almost 21 years. He ALWAYS does all he can to out-love & out-serve me. He is such a picture of Christ in my life.

  10. Advice for wives: Please don’t nag your husbands (Proverbs speaks volumes on this) and please do not belittle your husbands, especially in front of your kids and other people/in public. This makes you look silly, not your husband. The media is already doing enough to make men look like fools, let’s not add to this ungodly behavior. If you want to be treated like a queen, treat your husband like a king!

  11. the book is a must have and it seems to be very informative too. i love reading such books as it helps me in my relationships.

  12. Sounds like a book worthy of being read. We can all use a little bit of self-help no matter what phase of life we are in.

  13. A good tool for parents & those who are mentors to be able to share with young people and those that are entering the dating scene.

  14. That sounds like a good book for young girls to read.I’ve been married so long, I don’t even know the rules.

  15. Thanks for the Fantastic Review on Imparting Wisdom From โ€œThe New Rules for Love, Sex, and Datingโ€! I have to be honest with you. When I first read the title of this review, I thought Oh My, she read a book like that! She goes to church and talks to everyone about God! Then as I read your review I understood why you read this book! (relief!) I can see how the kids nowadays have different views on things than back In my day! I always knew when I got married, it was going to be it! Once and done! So far we’ve been married for 31 years this coming May 19th! Believe you me, we’ve been through some really terrific times and some really terrible bad times as well! What we are going through right now is a bad time and somehow we’re still here! My kids aren’t quite old enough to date yet and I haven’t had any questions or been asked about when they can date! I’m sure that day will be coming sooner than I would like to think! I went through it with my first daughter (she brought home some doozies!) We went through an awful lot of things and problems with her. Thank God she’s found her soul mate and is married and has 2 beautiful children (my grandbabies!) It’s a terrific thing that you do to talk to these kids and I love your confusing yet so true statement that you should be just like the person that you want! Thanks so much for this review, the pictures, and all the information on the book and relationships! I truly do appreciate it! Thanks again, Michele ๐Ÿ™‚
    Michele Ash recently posted..BOB Revolution SE Stroller GiveawayMy Profile

  16. I love this review and will copy it for my best friend of over 30 years. She is a single mom of a 16 year old honor student (the girl also works 3 hours a night after school, taking the bus) but though we do not thing she is sexually active..praise the lord..she has been through 2 brief but intense relations since joining high school and we are worried. If she reads this I am sure she will have a better understanding about love-sex-and dating..thank you

  17. That’s a good forum to reach out to young people and get them to open up. They may not feel comfortable talking to their parents, and peers may not have the best advice.

  18. I really THANK YOU for this review!! I was just talking about this subject with my granddaughter, who will be 19 in April about this very subject!! She goes to college, works & is a loyal Christian since she entered elementary school! I asked her if there was anyone special that she has likes or is interested in. She told me that she is not interested in a man that is not a Christian. She does not want to be unevenly yoked. She told me that marriage to her is very important and for life. She said that she knows she might have to wait – everything in God’s time – not hers. And what she has to give her husband one day is too precious to throw away! She has had other school girls make fun of her, but she doesn’t care that she is worth her weight in GOLD!!
    Needless to say, our family is so PROUD of her & I know our heavenly Father is too!!

    • I noticed your comment and feel the need to speak up.Your granddaughter is a jewel. She’s obviously been raised right and values herself. It’s so nice to hear something positive instead of all the bad things that people do. You should feel very proud!

  19. This sounds like a very interesting book. I’m not religious, but it sounds like there are tips in it that could be applied to anyone. I was not picky enough in my past and wound up in quite a few unhealthy relationships. I am in a good, happy, stable relationship now for the first time in many years. I wish I had had someone talk to me openly about this stuff when I was younger. The most important thing is to love yourself. I wish I had taken more time to learn who I was as a single young woman instead of always having to have a boyfriend in my life. It would have saved me so much heartache. Kids, my advice is just take it SLOW!

  20. This book sounds very interesting and I am glad you was able to stand up and speak to a younger croud, its not easy and this I know when it come to dating and such. I had hoped to have gotten this through one of my daughters but it was already too late, but by the grace of GOD they wed and they are happier than ever .. I huge part is having and keeping Christ Jesus in your family..
    Dorothy Boucher recently posted..This is the title of your first image postMy Profile

  21. I love the whole concept of be a queen if you want a king! I would have never thought that way but it is so true!

  22. I have a seventeen year old daughter and glad I have read this book. Times have changed and children are growing up so fast.

  23. I did not even know there were “new rules” – lol. Thank you so much for your review. This is definitely on my must read list.

  24. At 50, I would be at a complete loss to describe any rules for young people today, lol. The only thing I know is: the rules have definitely changed!

  25. I really like how they advise that if you want a king you have to be a queen — I always keep that in the back of my mind, because my expectations are pretty high, but why should someone amazing want me if I don’t strive to be amazing myself? Would love to read this!

  26. Thank you for sharing this book and I know a lot of people have never even thought about this.

  27. So true!! We must be what we are out there to find!! This book sounds like a great read!! What you do is so important!! I could’ve really used one of your chats as a young adult! Thanks for sharing!!

  28. This sounds like a perfect book to have. I love a good relationship read! Thanks for the review!

  29. Don’t go looking for someone. Go look for ways to help others that are enjoyable for you.

  30. Peer pressure is huge for teens. With the advent of social media came the impossible need to please everybody. If we can teach our youngsters the difference between right & wrong, to think before they act and to take responsibility for the consequences of their actions, I think we’re doing pretty well.